How To Sleep Train Your Toddler
The best method for sleep training is to start when they are infants so that when he or she becomes a toddler, you have already set the groundwork for good sleeping habits. However, If you are reading this blog you have probably already missed that boat. I FEEL YOUR PAIN! I co-slept my second infant, and it made for a very long a difficult sleep training process when he became a toddler. So here is how I did it!
It starts with time management. Make sure your child is tired when its time to sleep. If they are down to one nap a day, then they should be awake for at least 5 hours before attempting to put them down. Either Nap them later in the afternoon or wake them up earlier in the morning to make this gap. Keep this in mind for bedtime as well. If you want them to go to sleep at 8:00 pm, then they need to be up by 3:00 pm. MIND THE GAP!
Always make sure needs are met before you start. Clean diapers, full bellies, ample opportunity to be active during their awake periods.
Use their internal time clock. A routine is highly effective and helpful with young children. Whatever time frames you set up, be consistent.
Muscle memory (Bedtime tip). You want to have some rituals that tell their brain its almost time for bed long before you do. Create a calm regimen for them to wind down. Kill the screen time one hour before bed. Have bath time. Brush their teeth. Read a story. Have some chamomile tea. Choose rituals that you will be consistent with. This practice is also going to reinforce good habits for them as an adult.
Start slow! Don't shock them. Put all the other tips into practice for a week or so before you attempt to let them cry it out. You want them to enjoy all the benefits first, so they don't connect bath time or story time to cry it out time. You may find that its enough, and you don't even have to come to the "cry it out" crossroads! Wouldn't that be lovely! (fingers crossed)
Pick your battles! When you feel ready, then let them cry it out. I suggest tackling the bedtime routine before the nap time routine.
Commit! Do not turn back when you decide its time to cry it out. Be strong! If you let your child cry for thirty minutes and then get them, you have taught their muscle memory, and their internal time clock, that they have to cry for at least 31 minutes to get their way.
Remember: Children need sleep. This process is highly necessary. If you have met their needs and you have been loving, then this is the next step in good parenting. You are not mean. Sleep training is not selfish. You are a good parent.
Get help! If you have a spouse, friend, mom, sister, whoever, get some emotional support. It is painful to let your child cry. It is a natural response God puts in us to help us take care of our babes.
Try to understand that your babe is turning into a child with their own thoughts and opinions. It is your job to encourage and guide those thoughts, ideas, and mental connections. We care for and train our children, but, we do not serve them. When infants cry, that is your cue to fix something. When toddlers cry, it is not always so. When a child becomes more willful, then they need correction. Your child does not benefit if they believe they can demand you to serve them. You are the parent. You must win.